#Acting Class with Patrick White

[0anonnymouslyours0]

stanford!art who needs a rebound after tashi and patrick officially get together 

he’s seen you at games before, in little white tennis skirts, with your friends. one time patrick even pointed you out and said you were hot. so after a game, he approaches you. makes you laugh,and then blush when he compliments your outfit. your friends all nag you to leave, and you go before he can get your  number. he goes home and stalks your insta, until he finds a coffee shop you frequent. he spends a week going every morning, waiting in a booth to see if you show up. and one morning you do, in a short skirt that makes him shift in his seat. you spot him, go sit down. he orders and pays for your coffee. you ask about tennis, he asks if you have a boyfriend. you smile and bat your eyes when you say no. he asks for your number, and you laugh, saying he doesn’t get that quite yet. and then you leave, and art is left to his own devices. that being, convincing his professor to let him switch into your class. he comes into your class, acting all confused and lost. pretends to be surprised when he sees you sitting in the front. you wave him over, he sits down next to you. 

and the game begins.

every glass he sits a little closer to you, touches you a little more. once a week he pretends to study in the coffee shop. he walks around the gardens in front of your dorm in the afternoons. 

when you start showing up to all his tennis matches he knows he’s scored a point.

when he walks into the coffee shop and sees you already sitting in your seat in the morning, he knows. and when you rest your head on his shoulder mid-lecture he’s certain.

[dweemeister]

Whenever you feel alone, just remember that those kings will always be there to guide you. And so will I.

Born to a turbulent family on a Mississippi farm, James Earl Jones passed away today. He was ninety-three years old. Abandoned by his parents as a child and raised by a racist grandmother (although he later reconciled with his actor father and performed alongside him as an adult), the trauma of his childhood developed into a stutter that followed him through his primary school years – sometimes, his stutter was so debilitating, he could not speak at all. In high school, Jones found in an English teacher someone who found in him a talent for written expression, and encouraged him to write and recite poetry in class. He overcame his stutter by graduation, although the effects of it carried over for the remainder of his life.

Jones' most accomplished roles may have been on the Broadway stage, where he won three Tonys (twice winning Best Actor in a Play for originating the lead roles in 1969's The Great White Hope by Howard Sackler and 1987's Fences by August Wilson) and was considered one of the best Shakespearean actors of his time.

But his contributions to cinema left an impact on audiences, too. Jones received an Honorary Academy Award alongside makeup artist Dick Smith (1972's The Godfather, 1984's Amadeus) in 2011. From the end of Hollywood's Golden Age to the dawn of the summer Hollywood blockbuster in the 1970s to the present, Jones' presence – and his basso profundo voice – could scarcely be ignored. Though he could not sing like Paul Robeson nor had the looks of Sidney Poitier, his presence and command put him in league of both of his acting predecessors.

Ten of the films James Earl Jones appeared in, whether in-person or voice acting, follow (left-right, descending):

Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964) – directed by Stanley Kubrick; also starring Peter Sellers, George C. Scott, Sterling Hayden, Keenan Wynn, and Slim Pickens

The Great White Hope (1970) – directed by Martin Ritt; also starring Jane Alexander, Chester Morris, Hal Holbrook Beah Richards, and Moses Gunn

Star Wars saga (1977-2019; A New Hope pictured) – multiple directors, as the voice of Darth Vader, also starring Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, Peter Cushing, Alec Guinness, Billy Dee Williams, Anthony Daniels, David Prowse, Kenny Baker, Peter Mayhew, and Frank Oz

Claudine (1974) – directed by John Berry; also starring Diahann Carroll, Lawrence Hilton-Jacobs, and Tamu Blackwell

Conan the Barbarian (1982) – directed by John Milius; also starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sandahl Bergman, Ben Davidson, Cassandra Gaviola, Gerry Lopez, Mako, Valerie Quennessen, William Smith, and Max von Sydow

Coming to America series (1988 and 2021; original pictured) – multiple directors; also starring Eddie Murphy, Arsenio Hall, John Amos, Madge Sinclair, Shari Headley, Jermaine Fowler, Leslie Jones, Tracy Morgan, and KiKi Layne

The Hunt for Red October (1990) – directed by John McTiernan; also starring Sean Connery, Alec Baldwin, Scott Glenn, and Sam Neill

The Sandlot (1993) – directed by David Mickey Evans; also staring Tom Guiry, Mike Vitar, Patrick Renna, Chauncey Leopardi, Marty York, Brandon Adams, Grant Gelt, Shane Obedzinski, Victor DiMattia, Denis Leary, and Karen Allen

The Lion King (1994) – directed by Roger Allers and Rob Minkoff, as the voice of Mufasa; also starring Jonathan Taylor Thomas, Matthew Broderick, Jeremy Irons, Moira Kelly, Niketa Calame, Ernie Sabella, Nathan Lane, and Robert Guillaume, Rowan Atkinson, Whoopi Goldberg, Cheech Marin, Jim Cummings, and Madge Sinclair

Field of Dreams (1989) – directed by Phil Alden Robinson; also starring Kevin Costner, Amy Madigan, Ray Liotta, and Burt Lancaster

[cosmicpearlz]

under the mistletoe

summary: you friends decided enough was enough and had a plan to set you guys up together.

pairing: ajax petropolus x reader

day 2 of ficmas (december 20th, 2022)

…………………………………………………………………………….

you and ajax had a history of being the best friends that nobody could tell if you were dating or simply just friends. from lingering touches to you sitting on his lap at almost every party to pet names and even long hugs that ‘just friends’ don’t do. the friend group was planning on how to get you guys to confess to each other and the upcoming christmas party was definitely the perfect time.

it was an ugly sweater christmas party held at xavier’s house. of course, everyone had to wear an ugly sweater well except wednesday. she had threatened to murder enid when the girl tried to get her to put on the christmas sweater. wednesday didn’t even really want to go but enid had practically begged her to go and to get her to shut up, she reluctantly agreed to go.

“hi guys! sorry i’m late, the traffic was nuts,” you walked in to greet everyone with a smile. upon hearing your voice, ajax snapped his head up at the door completely forgetting the conversation he was in with kent.

“baby! i missed you,” the gorgon stands to meet you and pull you into hug. you felt yourself melt into his arms like you always did. he tended to have the feeling over you.

“you just saw me last week when school went on winter break.”

“a week too long. come, let’s get you some hot chocolate, yeah?” you nodded at the boys words and let him lead you by hand to the kitchen.

“that was a dreadful sight. why must they always be like that?” wednesday muttered to herself and enid nudged her arm to knock it off.

“enid, i’m just pointing out the obvious. it’s quite disgusting.”

“okay, do we know which doorway we’re hanging up the mistletoe on?” bianca quickly glanced at the two of you who were clearly in your own worlds before leaning in to whisper.

“yes. it’s the doorway before you go into the music room. that’s where we’ll do the white elephant game because the tree is in there. but remember, they must be the last to come in!” xavier reminded everyone and wordlessly everyone nodded along. the boy was pretty excited to help his best friend get his girl officially. when you and ajax walked back to the couches in the living room, they acted like nothing happened.

“so, what did we miss?” ajax took his previous seat guiding you to sit on his lap.

“nothing much besides how much fun white elephant was gonna be,” yoko didn’t understand how you guys didn’t even pay attention to anyone else but each other.

“oh yes! i’m so excited because i think i brought the best gift.”

“what’d you bring babe?” you looked at him while shaking your head.

“as if i would tell you,” ajax chuckled and placed a delicate kiss to your cheek.

-

“dinners ready!” xavier’s mom called out to the group of you from the dining room. everyone gets up to go to sit at the table. xavier’s mom decided to give you guys the space and not bother. his dad nowhere to be found, probably at work. xavier stopped relaying on his dad a while ago.

you went to sit next to ajax when xavier swooped in and sat in the seat. immediately following Kent sat in the other seat that was next to him. with furrowed brows, you walked around the table sitting across from him next to wednesday. you were a little upset that you didn’t get to physically sit next to the boy but hide it well. silently the group nodded once more to start the plan.

“so y/n, remember that guy patrick? the one from math class,” yoko smirked watching the way ajax’s jaw clenched. bingo, first indicator of jealousy.

“i mean yeah, what exactly about him?”

“he just was interested in you. i told him i’d mention it to you,” bianca sent you a smile while you suddenly felt uncomfortable.

“oh i’m just not interested in him. i’m sorry.”

“but you are single, right? why not just give it a shot?”

“enid she’s not interested,” ajax was quick to answer for you. he didn’t want to lose the best thing that’s ever happened to him. he’d think he would lose his mind if you were no longer in his life.

“i’m just saying,” enid shrugged her shoulders, “just think about it y/n.”

the rest of the dinner was quiet, the group had gotten you guys right where they wanted you. they could see ajax almost burst out the confession. step two was next.

“so everyone, white elephant is gonna take place in the music. c’mon,” as soon as xavier said that everyone was quick to get up. you’d almost laughed at them practically running to the room.

“you think they have something planned babe?” ajax whispered walking over to you helping you get up.

“honestly, i think they do. i mean i couldn’t sit next to you and the whole patrick situation,” you sighed throwing your hands up.

“are you gonna talk to patrick after break?” the boy was nervous to hear your answer but he needed to know even if his heart was currently thumping.

“what? absolutely not. i’m interested in someone else,” you looked down and smiled thinking about the boy standing right next to you. all ajax could hope was that you return those feelings he felt for you.

the walk to the music room was a short walk. when you got to the doorway, you noticed everyone had gotten quiet all of sudden. some staring and some smirking.

“hey ajax and y/n look up,” kent pointed up at the door. looking up you both found mistletoe neatly tape.

“it’s a christmas tradition. you wouldn’t want to break christmas traditions, right?” xavier faked the innocent smile he had. ajax turned to look at you with slightly warm cheeks.

“we don’t have to do this sweetheart.”

“what if i wanted to?” you gazed at him with a smile. instantly his hands were placed on your cheeks tilting your head more up before locking his lips with yours. finally, after years he’s kissing you. the kiss becomes a little more aggressive as ajax slides one arm around your waist pushing you more into him. you were careful not to mess up his beanie while your heads landed on his face.

“you guys are disgusting. this is unnecessary,” wednesday cold voice made you both step away from each other.

“well? are you guys finally together?! we set this whole thing up even down to talking about patrick,” enid almost couldn’t contain the squeal that came out of her mouth.

“oh so that’s what was going on?”

“yeah ajax, we knew it would make you jealous. got sick of seeing you guys act like a couple but saying you were just friends. so.. now what?” xavier asked his best friend hoping this plan the group had changed everything for the better.

ajax takes one glance at you and tighten the hold on your waist, “i’d say she’s officially my girl now.”

“yup, this sweet boy is officially mine,” you bring a hand to cover the little laugh you let out. you then guided the two of you to the floor where your friends were sitting in a circle and sat down in between his legs.

“okay let’s start the game!”



[woah-uhuh-uhuh-uhuh]

(ALMOST) EVERYTHING I NOTICED FROM BAC BMC

NOTE: spot check me!

It was the Two Rivers script, but I still haven't read the whole Two Rivers script so if I mention something I noticed that’s actually just… in the script… lmk!

Also: if you also saw the BAC production (or if you are the BAC people???) and I missed something, let me know!!! Literally anything at all I will put it here I’d love to approach comprehensiveness!!

ALSO: Spoilers! If you plan on going to Jake’s Halloween Party maybe wait? Or don’t!!

CHARACTERS

Madeline

Putting Madeline here because the first thing I noticed in the whole show is she’s ACTUALLY A FRANCOPHILE and it’s so funny ldksjfjsfksdlf. She wears a beret, and people put on a stereotypical French accent whenever they quote her djslkfjsfkfds And during the play backstage someone (I think Chloe?) runs up to her, smacks her beret off and yells “You’re not French!”

Jeremy

OH oh oh oh oh. Bac Jeremy my beloved…. I swear like 30% of Christine’s autism was generously donated to Jeremy for this production jlkdsfjdls

He has this habit where he’ll put his hands in his cardigan pockets and push his them around in front of him or on his body to feel the tension of the jacket stretching. Patrick said this quirk was based on a neurodivergent kid he knows. I don’t have photo evidence and IDK how to describe it perfectly but i did draw it here (x). It wasn't exactly like that though OTL

He does it whenever he’s nervous (so almost CONSTANTLY) up until BMC P.1 when the SQUIP tells him to take his hands out of his pockets. During that song you can see him trying to put his hands back safe in his pockets but afterwards he never does it again, even after The Play. He also doesn’t do it when he’s with Michael, even at the beginning, so I take it to mean it goes away when he’s comfortable. 

I think he flinches and cowers a lot (compared to other Jeremys, that is). Whenever Rich surprises him, Jeremy jumps and protectively throws his arms over his face. I think he reacts similarly to other people a few times - I don’t remember when exactly though… There’s also several times where he’ll stand totally petrified out of fear, like when Rich is writing “boyf” or when Chloe’s coming onto him. By all of this I basically mean it’s really obvious he’s been physically abused (presumably by Rich).

Just in general, his freakouts are very physical, he’ll kinda do these stiff arm movements or cover his face in his elbow etc. Off the top of my head this happens during Upgrade and also at the end of The Play when Christine’s singing to him.

All this to say he has a very very visible physicality to his awkwardness and I love it. I don’t just mean that on a character acting level, I also mean like if you’re sitting behind him in class your attention will actively be caught by his awkwardness. 

He also has a deeper register which he uses mostly in a joke context? He used it in normal conversation a few times too, I think more towards the end.

I noticed him standing just a little pigeon-toed near the beginning. I don’t know if this carried through the whole thing though.

Clothes: his cardigan is blackish with a blue outline, and he wears it over a green shirt with a question mark (I perceived it as a Gravity Falls shirt but might be wrong). The eminem shirt is black and I dont remember what he wears it with…. At the party he has a cyborg shirt and a visor, and after the party he has a white shirt with a flannel and khakis (or maybe light corduroys). In VIMH he has another fandom shirt on but I don’t remember what it was sorry it was 11pm ljfsdlkfjdslkfs

Its so obvious I’m a Jeremy stan this entry is the largest one sorry 🧍

Mr. Heere

He seemed less depressed and more just out of touch in this one? During Two Player Game, he seems decently chipper, if annoyed, though of course he’s still unable to dress himself and unwilling to put genuine effort in with his son. 

When he says “Good talk” he gives Jeremy a friendly shoulder punch. Right before Pants Song, as usual, he says “I could ground you!” Jeremy says “I don’t think you could,” and gives his dad the same shoulder punch while saying “Good talk.” AAAAAAH.

Michael

He seemed less frenetic and anxious than the Troy!Michael I’m used to (sorry that’s my only reference for Michael lol). 

He was generally loud and exuberant. A very excitable but down-to-earth Michael. 

MITB was amazing. I was nervous because it’s obviously (obviously) the best song so there’s a lot of pressure but no it was done perfectly. Sad as fuck. Perhaps moreso because this Michael was especially normal until now. (Also because pre-MITB Jeremy was extra mean in this production)

For some reason, I found it easier to picture this Michael being a childhood & school friend? Maybe just because this production seriously pulled my psyche straight back to highschool in a way the others haven’t been able to lol. 

I maybe got the sense that he’s really trying to act like he doesn’t care as much about Jeremy as he does. 

BTW I’m obsessed with the fact that his idea of a creeper costume is a mask and a shirt that just says creeps on it. I know that’s kinda textual at this point but taken together with the mask its lkesdjfsdjflksdf

Christine

Amazing ballet (?) choreography going on during her intro. I think that might be standard Christine choreo but still! Stunning.

I could actually picture her as an averagely popular girl in this one? Not sure why. Maybe more nervous in her relationships but more confident in other contexts, but I could be pulling that out of my ass. 

I could also be thinking this because she has cool hair (space buns!) and likes Taylor Swift in this one. 

Some of her songs had these really melancholy notes where I didn’t expect them - particularly in GTIKBI Reprise (/pos! I was like oh shit!!! every time)

Rich

He has painted nails! They’re black. 

He had fruity energy the whole time but it got progressively more intense. No I can’t elaborate actually I don’t know why I perceived it like this but I did sldjkfsf

After he comes out it gets more explicit; he starts wearing a pink headband in VIMH (he also gains glasses I think? Unless they’re still Michael’s) and during bows he flashed a paper fan that had the gay flag inside. 

IMO, it was implied that the house fire was a suicide attempt. I say this for purely textual reasons -  because he doesn’t mention trying getting the SQUIP out of his head, and because Jeremy’s SQUIP later implies it was a suicide attempt. But his behavior around the fire - looking dazed while rhythmically flicking a lighter - could also indicate squipzophrenia. (Maybe it’s the same amount of implied as usual - To be fair, I’ve never really understood why Rich set a fire in the first place…)

Brooke

Very wholesome and I love her. IDK Broadway Brooke is very campy, and BAC Brooke is more like a normal sweet girl but maybe that’s just me 

Compared to Broadway, way more respectful of Jeremy’s space. She doesn’t really try to physically seduce him in upgrade instead they just have a cute lil conversation. Also when she tells Jeremy she got cheated on, she doesn’t initiate contact by petting his hair (like in Broadway) - instead the roles are reversed and they hold hands comfortingly, and Jeremy is the one to escalate that by rubbing her hand in a slightly forward way. 

Her French was awful!!! sdjkfldjsfkdsf It was the whole time but Tres Magnifique = "Trays Mag-nuh-Fike" is the one that really killed me

Chloe

Not to be backhanded… but she was really good at being a bitch??? Especially the scene where she’s giving Christine advice

Maybe closetedly wlw based on the delivery of “I like gay people” and the events of The Play??

The Chloe Jenna friendship intrigues me so much… what’s going on there…

Jenna 

Sadder than Broadway Jenna… 

When Chloe mentions her in play rehearsal she jumps up from across the room and says “I’m here!!” to no reaction.

Later in Smartphone Hour -  J: “....because you are my closest friend-” C: “No I’m not” J: “Yeah I know….” Jenna sounds kinda genuinely bummed lol. Either she wasn’t expecting that or she’s *very* aware of it and it’s making her sad. My impression was more the latter.

During VIMH she’s wearing a sweater that’s colored like the lesbian flag??? (EDIT: the actor, Diana, said this was intentional and her Jenna is a lesbian!)

Idk idk actor so good she made me care so much more about Jenna dsfljdf

Jake

Maybe a touch more upfront about the fact that he feels a lot of pressure in his life

He was dumb <3

Mrs. Reyes

She’s a woman in this one!

She has a hippie thing going on i think?? Like a boho mom (affectionate)

Pronounces Reyes with a (several second long) rolled R at the beginning

Doesn’t do the stiff announcer-like angle that the broadway guy does. Her comedy is more crazy cat ladyish

The hot pocket breaks were preceded by an actual alarm sound I think???? bonkers fkljd

Ensemble

BIG ENSEMBLE WAS SO FUN…. They had so many funny bits going on in the background it was soooo good and another reason I wish I could watch it over and over because I couldn’t be paying attention to everything at once OTL

Scene by scene

Organized by song, but scene notes are in there too!

More Than Survive

"Madeline was all like-" *bad french accent* "ohohoho, I'll only sleep with you if you beat me at ze pool~"

“Oh my god he is like totally getting off on that” ← right before this Jeremy starts pointing at them awkwardly from a distance, I think in an attempt to get to his locker?? 

“I like gay people” - the way Chloe says this is kinda like “idk what the big deal is because *i* think gay people are soooo neat” which got a lot of audience laugh. I think she was talking to Jenna but I don’t remember 

“I don’t wanna be a baller” (or whenever the class scene is) - Jeremy’s sitting in the back of class and everyone turns to throw paper balls at him. I was like oh my god he’s being genuinely bullied so hard in this one…. Then again maybe that’s just how he feels?

There’s this awesome chair choreo at the end where everyone’s laying down chairs in front of Jeremy for him to walk on and taking them away from the back to put back in the front as he makes his way downstage.

Scene: Michael's "You don't have to do this!" kind of came across as a shout of protest. (But of course still tempered with, "of course i'll make fun of you forever if you don't)

Play Rehearsal

"This is where you meet for the swim team" --- Instead of looking confused, Jeremy immediately acts like ok byeee - he might be eager to back out of the conversation and/or immediately accepts her answer as literal and wants to leave asap out of embarrassment.

“I also have a touch of ADD” - she trails off and stands there kind of in a daze for a moment, before remembering that she’s in the middle of a song. 

“And can I mention that was really one of my best roles, DID YOU SEE THAT?!" She shouts this very proudly. And after her 'do you find that?' bit she doesn’t give Jeremy time to even try to respond, so it’s a little less rude lol. 

Jeremy was very anxious, and somewhat in a bad way? As in the exchange was a bit off-putting to him.

Scene: “thank god the popular kids are here” - there are SO MANY kids entering. I’m not sure what to make of it! Popular as in everyone’s popular compared to Jeremy and Christine? Or is this a whole clique? Or is Reyes just talking about the popular kids and the other guys also just show up? 

Mrs. Reyes: ~"Our funds will be diverted. To the frisbee golf team. What even is frisbee golf?" Across the room, Jake holds up a frisbee and silently points at it, trying to get Reyes' attention. She doesn't notice.

After scene: Jake’s “pressure to be the best at everything” is said very genuinely, not for laughs at his arrogance which is how I usually read it

Squip Song

Rich actor KILLED it just gotta put that out there

“So it’s like….” Jeremy takes an extended moment to walk to the edge of the stall and look behind to make sure nobody’s there - “...drugs?”

In the end of the song, Rich rubs his dirty hands all over Jeremy's arm.

The Squip Enters

Scene: Payless: “Wolverine” was great djklsfjdsf I’ve never thought about him before. (It was also the actor’s birthday!) When they enter he’s playing the knife-finger game. He threatens Jeremy with the knife at some point (either “400 dollars” or “all sales are final!” I think?). I can’t really describe the character acting but he was very entertainingly unhinged. He's called “Scary Stockboy” in the script & playbill and I thought that was a misnomer until the scene happened lmao. No that was accurate. 

Scene: when they enter the food court there’s like a photo of a mall food court on the back wall but not from the perspective of the scene at all it was like a background that abstractly tells you where you are?? As someone who loves kitsch I enjoyed this, it happens with a few other scenes too 

There’s a couple making out obnoxiously at the mall that someone (I think it was Michael?) had to step over to get to the table. I think they had some great thematically relevant background acting in this scene but I cannot remember it exactly I am so sorry OTL

Michael is buying Ecto-Cooler! It tastes like ghosts.

Jeremy “mourns in his chili fries” by laying his head down on the table. Jake and Christine sit at the table together without noticing him. Then Jeremy pops up and they have the usual exchange (“I didn’t see you!” “Yeah, you’re kind of hard to notice”). I thought that was a really neat staging!! And it makes more sense why he even tries to talk to her in this scene lol

Mild discomfort - The first half Jeremy just stands next to the table and kinda screams in pain. Then the second half he falls to the ground and is thrashing, again mostly just in pain. (Pretty sure that’s how every production goes but I think the intensity of the spasming is pretty variable so I’m describing it here)

When the SQUIP first appears, he offers to appear as Kermit the Frog, Barack Obama, and Gilbert Gottfried, and does a little impression for each one:

The imitations the Squip does are as follows: Kermit the Frog “hi ho Kermit the frog here, we’re gonna fix your life Yayyyyy”, Obama “My fellow Squip, if sync up we can change this loser” and Gilbert Gottfried “So Grandma and the dog are on the table…” - Courtesy of director Chris Guell because I couldn't remember them OTL (thank you!!!)

Also in the middle of this Jeremy says "That's a terrible Obama impression..."

Be more Chill p.1

Brooke and Chloe are shopping on the upstage side of the clothes rack; when Jeremy picks out the girls shirt, Brooke appears through the gap in the clothes and surprises him.

After the song, one of the ensemble steals the clothes rack and the mall cop chases him off stage in a very cartoonishly stiff sprint.

Do you wanna ride?

After the first rejection, Brooke goes to Chloe, who points out the satchel she has belted around her waist. As she starts to sing again she slowly unbuckles it and holds it behind her back. 

Jeremy is very into it by the end and the girls have him dancing along with the music. I think you can see that in one of the promo videos too :P

Be More Chill p.2

Scene: When Jeremy’s going to bed after the mall, instead of sleepily singing, he uses a silly deep voice to say something like “yeah be more chill i’m gonna be more chill i’m gonna be so chill that ice is relatively warm”

After Rich talks to Jeremy (“hey, tallass, where’s my money?” and then they sync up) he spots a girl across the stage and yells “Hey, where’s my money?” then chases her down the hall. 

Guy that I’d Kinda be Into

Scene: during the rehearsal - JR: "Bring me patient zero!" Then Chloe, sitting on the ground, looks through her script for like 45 seconds until finding her line: "Cough!"

At “I’ve been activating your pheromones” - Jeremy starts and looks at his armpits, then as the song continues he slowly pulls his arms up to rest behind his head, it was very comedic djflkdsf. He also uses one hand to waft from his armpit before returning to that position. Guy...

I think this is also the scene he uses a script to hide his boner??

They were so cute at the end!!! Just sitting next to each other in rehearsal and kinda leaning in towards each other. Very real very high school. 

Upgrade

Scene: While Jeremy and SQUIP argue about Eminem, Brooke is (silently) describing the accident. She mimes hitting a hockey puck, then being impaled in the guts repeatedly.

Instead of literal bleachers (at least visually), Brooke and Jeremy go sit on the top of the stairs that lead off of the stage and into the audience. They kinda playfully walk around the railings and stuff, and at the point in the Broadway version where they start aggressively making out, instead they just sit next to each other and talk and it’s very cute :) 

Jeremy’s freaking the fuck out in the middle and it’s so obviously sensory overload auauuauuauaugh. He was like contorting to cover his head in his arms. Guy…

Halloween

Brooke’s costume is a sexy dalmatian! She has an eyespot and a black and white skirt + other spotty white clothes. Jeremy’s cyborg costume only extends to the shirt & a visor. I think it matched with the squip’s visor?

THE PROJECTOR…. On the background was the funniest background it could possibly be it was like a graphic of a cartoon skeleton holding a wooden sign that said “Jake’s Halloween Party”. IDK if that’s a poster he got printed or if it’s an extremely camp way of abstractly giving us the setting or what but I WAS LOSING IT SLKDJFKDSJFSD 

I WISH I had a picture of it, but in lieu of that I recreated it for you and I swear it was like 95% exactly like this. just projected on the wall behind the stage.

Do you wanna hang?

Right before this scene, there’s a huge group choreo where people dance with partners, and in the last move one partner spins the other one down, who lands on the floor looking up at them. Jeremy ends up on the floor and Chloe walks up and stands over him while inviting him to come with her. 

TW - This scene is always sexual assault, but the tone felt especially dark this time – maybe it was just seeing it live, though. 

Jeremy’s standing frozen still as the song starts and kind of visibly recoiling as Chloe walks around him. She walks behind him and shoves her hands into his coat pockets, which makes him flinch. Extra upsetting because like I said before I think his coat pockets are kind of a place of safety for him :(((

Pretty sure the SQUIP's Japanese was different from the Broadway. Wasn't sure quite what he said, but it I think it *didnt* include these from the Broadway one: お腹が空いた (I'm hungry) and お疲れ様 ('pleasure doing business with you,' i think?)

Michael in the Bathroom

Scene: Jeremy seems very shaken after DYWH and sits on the bathtub sadly; when Michael reveals himself Jeremy flips out.

Michael talks about “his clever disguise” and makes monster growls (meant as creeper hisses?) - I think with the tone that he’s trying to get Jeremy to respond to the joke, or point out the reference or something. When that fails, he starts getting serious. 

“Get out of my way, loser” is delivered very confidently. 

After Michael says he’s on his period, Jenna opens the door a crack to hand him a tampon dsjfkldsjflkdsjf. He throws it in the bathtub later at “I’m a creeper in a bathroom….”

Also of course, he’s in a creeper mask lol

Song: WONDERFULLY done. Honestly don’t have much to say it was just great. I get desensitized to that song after hearing it so much, but seeing it live definitely brought a spark to it.

“And I look in the mirror and the present is clearer…” section is like the *key* part of this song to me and Connor Introna did it really well. His voice started breaking at mirror, and of course he did the little sob and everything it was just chefs kiss

Guy that I’d Kinda be Into Reprise

When Jeremy asks why Rich didn’t give him a warning and Rich starts saying “warning” over and over, he says it at a steady rhythm until he gets off stage. Then Jeremy tries to rouse a drunken partier to say “So that was weird…” and Rich’s “Warning” randomly interrupts Jeremy like 3 times to comedic effect before he can get the words out

"Popular people are messed up" - less in response to Rich & more in response to the guy Rich is talking to passing out drunk (iirc)

This is just a 2R things but it hit me so just pointing out she just says “I’m not Juliet” in this one (rather than we’re not romeo and juliet) and auuauguughghg poor Christine :(

Weird noises: it’s kinda like a dinosaur impression in this one? They both go like RAAHH and make claw hands in the air. Then Jeremy stands up and pretends to be driving a car (I think???? lol) and Christine copies him

Christine starts standing up while Jeremy’s still asking her out. As soon as he finishes the question she immediately rejects him. That is to say, she saw where this was going and already knew her answer.

After the scene, Rich walks back across the room, flicking a lighter on and off in a daze. 

ALSO: Ensemble were very entertaining in the whole party! During this scene there were 3 of them playing spin the bottle downstage left and it had like a whole arc to it sdnjkfdfdsf Also guys passed out on the floor and on the couch 

Smartphone Hour

Starts w/ Jenna sitting on the edge of the stage, dangling her legs over the pit. 

Brooke is sadly eating Rich’s loaf of bread. (After she forgives Chloe she passes it to some other actor offstage which I probably wasn’t supposed to see but it was funny lol. communal machete bread)

THE PROJECTOR….. Everyone was holding phones and in the background was footage from their front-facing cameras (prerecorded, but it synced pretty well with the live actors). Then you could see the GUI of them typing some of the lyrics (“rich fled to bombay!!”) into imessage and twitter

AND THEN you see footage of the house burning down on an insta reel…. An unremarkable suburban house where you can see flames consuming the roof. This same footage plays on a few people’s reels, then there’s also footage of firemen coming and putting the fire out and its SO REALISTIC i was losing it 

Around “Changed my profile pic to you” it shows a bunch of (presumably) instagram photos of Rich like in his house and at school or wherever and i wont lie it made me feel for him a lot more. They were like actual full staged photos :( like thats a real guy in there… 

Pitiful children

Scene: When Jenna asks if the SQUIP is a drug, she does the same extended thing of checking to see that nobody’s watching that Jeremy did in The Squip Song

The Pants Song

Scene: see my notes on Mr. Heere aaaaaauguh

Michael’s sitting on his front steps while smoking weed from a tiny green bong. You can tell it’s his front steps because there’s a mailbox next to him labeled MELL BOX in big letters dslkfjdskfjs

Michael’s wearing pants - I think that’s just textually accurate but reporting it anyway

When Mr. Heere comes over (“do you love him?”), he puts one leg on the top step and Michael is eye-level with his crotch. Michael has trouble tearing his eyes away. This happens a few times. In my opinion, it made him come off as a lot more high than he usually does lol

If I remember correctly, they get very intense and like shoulder-grabby at one point. Could’ve been a different scene though I dont remember OTL OTL

The Play

Michael comes out of the audience!!! It was cool it was meta lol

PINKBERRY CANON SDLKFJDKLFJKFJLSF. Brooke and Chloe have the Two Rivers dialogue (He didn’t sleep with you? He didn’t sleep with me!) then after Sisters forever! they do these actions to the rhythm of three staccato beats: “Jinx!” *high five(?)* *KISS ON THE LIPS* and instantly pull away. They're extremely normal about it and are just standing there afterwards without moving or acknowledging it. 

Despite being in the middle of a zombie apocalypse, Jeremy is dumbstruck and stares at them for a few beats before moving on to the next line. It was amazing. No notes. 

Jeremy is horrified when Christine starts singing to him. She walks robotically over to him and speaks kind of like she’s reading off a script (hehehe). Jeremy is backing up against a wall and freaking out almost like he’s trying to get away from her. No implication at all that he’s tempted. 

When everyone starts screaming in pain, Michael is screaming in triumph. (Or at least he looked very triumphant, I don’t remember if he screamed lol)

Voices in My Head

Rich is in a wheelchair. Also he doesn't have a lisp.

Rich is wearing Michael’s glasses. When he starts asking about Michael, Michael shows up and takes his glasses back. I think Rich steals them back at some point too? 

Michael acts a lil flirty with Rich - approximately "I'm sure you'll find something very special," then in a tiny high voice: “but not with meeeee…!” and he pushes Rich’s wheelchair so he rolls offstage jdsfkldsfkfd

At “Tell her that she excites you sexually” Rich does a little wheelie to (presumably) represent a pelvic thrust (all of these Rich moments were excellent I loved this Rich sm)

Christine’s squip was Taylor Swift this time!

At “I know the last thing I deserve is another shot, but…” He trails off and there’s a pause before “Just say what’s on your mind, Jeremy.” I know they get together obviously, but it felt like it could go either way! Maybe because it was live.

(And then they cccccome on lets go and do bows, in character i think, and it was amazing the end)

I was gonna write a TLDR here but honestly all of it was amazing and if you want the highlights it’s pretty much just the stuff I bolded!

Also end note the actors were all soooo nice and they let me ramble to them about jeremy for several minutes Q____Q it was amazing im so happy about this still I wish I got their signatures sjdlfkjdsfkdsf

I hope everyone gets to watch the show at some point but otherwise I hope this can be useful to someone!!

[morbidology]

Patrick Purdy's name may not resonate with the same notoriety as Adam Lanza, the perpetrator of the devastating "Sandy Hook Massacre," but his rampage at Cleveland Elementary School in Stockton, California, left an indelible mark on the community.

Born in Tacoma, Washington in 1964, Purdy's troubled upbringing set the stage for the violent act he would commit years later. The seeds of instability were sown early in Purdy's life when his parents' relationship deteriorated to the point where his father threatened his mother with a firearm, leading to their divorce when Purdy was just two years old. 

Growing up, he turned to alcohol as a coping mechanism, leading to conflicts that culminated in his expulsion from his mother's home. For months, Purdy experienced the harsh reality of homelessness until he found temporary refuge in foster care. Eventually, he was adopted into a family, but the allure of escapism through substance abuse persisted.

The tragic death of his father in a traffic accident when Purdy was 17 exacerbated his emotional turmoil. He accused his mother of pilfering the money left behind for him, further fueling his sense of betrayal. Throughout his adolescence, he found himself entangled with law enforcement, primarily due to his drug addiction. Struggling to finance his habit, he resorted to engaging in sex work and was frequently arrested for various offenses, from drug dealing to robbery. 

During one particularly dark period, Purdy attempted to take his own life, and upon his release from the hospital, he received a diagnosis of "mental retardation." In 1987, he delved into white supremacist literature, expressing discontentment with the significant Asian population in his vicinity, as well as at San Joaquin Delta College, where he pursued welding classes. Although Purdy's friends would later describe him as suicidal, they emphasized that he never exhibited overt violence.

Purdy's apartment in Stockton became a peculiar enclave filled with toy soldiers, reflective of his idiosyncrasies. While his inner turmoil and sense of failure were apparent, there were no overt signs of the tragedy that lay ahead. On January 17, 1989, an anonymous caller contacted the Stockton Police Department, forewarning them of an imminent attack targeting the young students of Cleveland Elementary School, Purdy's former school. Despite this alarming tip, classes proceeded as scheduled, oblivious to the impending tragedy.

Around noon, Purdy parked his car behind the school, packed with fireworks that he promptly ignited, causing an explosive blast. He proceeded to the school playground, armed with a semi-automatic rifle, indiscriminately firing upon the unsuspecting victims. Within a brief span of three minutes, he discharged 106 rounds, claiming the lives of five children and leaving another 30 injured. The majority of the deceased and wounded were of Cambodian or Vietnamese descent, children of immigrant parents in search of a better life in America. Following the carnage, Purdy turned the gun on himself, ending his own life.

The ghastly massacre left a haunting question echoing through the nation: How could a troubled individual like Purdy, with an extensive history of instability, effortlessly acquire an AK-47 from a firearms store without arousing suspicion? The sole purpose of such weapons is to cause harm and end human life. The shock and outrage following the tragedy prompted legislative action, resulting in the passage of the Roberti-Roos Assault Weapons Control Act of 1989, marking a pivotal step towards banning assault weapons in California.

[fantasyinvader]

Regarding Heroes depicting Edelgard looking for pawns with a “low sense of self.” A sense of self, or rather an understanding of who you are, is something important to have. It allows us to be ourselves, as we know what comes from us and what comes from others. That I genuinely believe A, B, and C and therefore support those rather than supporting X, Y and Z because I see others supporting them. Or to use a literary example, this is rampant in American Psycho as it's characters are so caught up in appearances that they dress like buffoons because it's supposedly fashionable, eat foods they like because it's trendy, buy art they don't understand to look sophisticated and spout beliefs they don't believe because society tells them they are correct. This all leads to Patrick Bateman either being or imagining himself as a serial killer in order to feel like an individual in such a conformist society (with the novel having clues he's not the only one doing this.

Ironically, Edelgard says this to Jeritza who she uses for the Death Knight. She took Emile killing to save his mother and sister and twisted that, leading to a man with severe mental illness that is degrading his mind and a desire to die in order to stop his “other self.” Not to mention, her calling a man she's admitting to using a pawn. And considering that Edelgard is dressed up as the Flame Emperor in this, which is also her ending title, this likely reflects what her actual views are.

Jeritza, Hubert, Monica, even Byleth aren't friends or allies, as she continues to believe that she is all alone in this struggle and fails to see their contributions for what they actually are. Edelgard merely sees them as pawns, tools she can shape to do whatever she wants. That's her going after those will low senses of self. Hell, this is her attempt at consoling Byleth after Jeralt's death. Hell, if you think about it the decision to join Edelgard ultimately comes down to ignoring Byleth's default stance, the morality they would have otherwise gained in White Clouds, in order to side with Edelgard. We disregard Byleth's character by deciding to support Edelgard.

And this is something that really clicked. Remember Seteth's infamous line about how Edelgard is not merely a tyrant? I think this is what it's referring to. She is not a mere tyrant, she's something worse. She does something to people in a less literal manner than TWSITD, she turns people into animals.

Her path is called out in the Japanese text by Dimitri as the path of the beast, which relating to Buddhist terms means that it's a path of ignorance, delusion or foolishness. Animals don't operate on morality or reason, they operate on instinct where the strong prey on the weak and the weak fear the strong. We can see a reflection of this in the parley, where when challenged on the world she seeks to create only benefiting the strong Edelgard in turn blames the weak if her world doesn't benefit them. Meanwhile, the world of humans is where souls can exercise self-control, not falling prey to their instincts and instead act in a humane manner. And it's from the world of humans that you can start working towards Nirvana, but without control a soul can fall back into one of the lower realms. It's the route where Byleth spiritually regresses, and in Azure Moon we see Edelgard turn herself into a beast unit as supposedly the end point of her ideals.

Now think about the “low sense of self” in the context of this. By siding with Edelgard, Byleth loses their paralogue where Rhea leaves behind her shield because Byleth ended up betraying Rhea. On top of that, Ferdinand and Caspar lose theirs as well despite being native to the Black Eagle class. Those paralogues and their rewards are lost to the player, in addition to how Ferdinand can not be confronted with his father being blamed for Arundel's actions or Caspar can't prove his strength against the Death Knight he wanted to bring down. Linhardt supports a bloody war despite hating bloodshed, Bernie is so scared she resolves herself to kill others before they can kill her, Petra fights to enslave two nations to free her own from the Empire, and Dorothea will support Edelgard's fuck the poor mentality while blaming Sothis for the war Edelgard started. And that's not counting the optional recruits to Safflower.

They lose some of who they are when they side with Edelgard, and I don't think they're the only ones. When Edelgard sets up the Southern Church in Hopes with a wildly different gospel, it's noted in game that it appeals to people who didn't like what the Church of Seiros taught. And we also know that the Imperial army kills everyone who doesn't bend the knee, and according to the Japanese text go out of control while invading other nations post-war. Edelgard's influence is turning people into animals, making them lose whatever morality they had as well as their ability to reason. Like at the end of Safflower, some of the cast realize that Edelgard is lying to them and keeping things secret while blaming the Church for Arianrhod but they still support her to the end. Even characters who reject Edelgard's beliefs and instead still practice altruism still supported her in making Fodlan Ayn Rand's wet dream.

The last chapter being called “To the end of a dream” ending with the cutscene where Rhea is killed called “A world for humanity” though. I believe those are ultimately related to this. It's not that Edelgard kills Rhea and ushers in an era of humanity, it's that by killing Rhea and replacing Sothis's teachings with her own beliefs, Edelgard is ending the world of humanity as she pushes Fodlan back into the world of animals. That in doing so, Edelgard takes away teachings that teach morality or reasoning in order to impose her own will upon Fodlan. The will that would lead her to becoming the Hegemon Husk while still believing she's doing this for “humanity.” But her ideals are implied to have come from the Agarthans manipulating her into creating a world for them, and to the Agarthans “beasts” are anyone who is a non-Agarthan because they view themselves as the only true humans. But at the same time, they do not act in a humane manner or are self-aware enough to realize their fall from grace was a consequence of their own actions (much like Edelgard). In essence, the people calling others beasts are the real beasts themselves.

It's the subversion here. Much like how you need to rescue the dragon from the princess, the dragon represents humanity whereas the princess represents devolving into a mindless, immoral monster. And it took Heroes to help point it out because of the translation fucking things up.

[waitingandwishing]

(Cross posted on Wattpad and AO3)

~And he is not the only one~

Prev - Next Chapter

Trixie ruffled her blue hair with her hands nervously. It was an impulse decision, something her brother surprisingly agreed with. About a week after the ‘accident’ she decided to cut her hair to her shoulders and dye it navy blue.

She took her medication before changing into a white tank top and sliding a fitted yellow top over it. Trixie wore high-waisted blue jeans with a pair of tan colored shoes. A knock on the door startled her.

“Hey, are you ready to go?” Patrick knocked and Trixie opened the door with a nod, following him out the door.

As she entered the car with Patrick driving, she bit her lip as her thoughts roamed around her head. She definitely wasn’t ready to go back to school, not after what happened with Miguel…

Of course, she went to therapy once a week like her doctor suggested she do, and she definitely felt a bit better about talking about her feelings. She pushed everything away for people she cared about so it felt nice to talk about things she hadn’t opened up about before.

 Even though she knew therapy helped a lot, she was more reserved than usual. She had been seen with a straight face more than smiling or laughing. Of course, they could break her shell for a moment. Hawk would make a comment and she’d laugh or something stupid would happen and she’d shake her head with a smile.

But it wasn’t the same.

Patrick dropped Trixie off with a wave as she entered the school. It was time for school, there was more security roaming around then usual. As she walked into the school, her bag was checked and she had to walk through a metal detector. 

Bert walked up to Mitch and Hawk. "Hey." He said. Hawk looked over at the smaller kid.

 "There's the man." He greeted him with a smile. "This is the year, day one round two. Let's get it boys." Hawk said, looking between the two. Trixie walked up to Hawk with a wave and Hawk’s expression changed to one of sympathy. “How’re you doing?” He asked and Trixie shrugged.

“Fine, the meds are helping.” She said before adding, “Thanks for asking.”

"Oohh." Mitch said with a smile as he watched a group of girls walk in. "Freshmen babes, nine o'clock." Mitch said and Trixie rolled her eyes.

Hawk smiled and looked at them as they walked. "Hey I know freshman year can be kinda scary so if anyone gives you any trouble, you can come to me. I'm the guy.." He had a small smirk on his face. 

"Who wets the bed and got kicked into a trophy case? Yeah we know." The girl in the front said sassily, before they turned and walked away. Trixie chuckled lightly and Hawk smiled softly at the sound. The girls were passing Demetri, Chris and Nate. "Hey, Demetri." She said with a smile as she passed by with her group. 

The three boys turned to watch them, shock clear on their faces. "Someone knows who I am… A human female." He said with a shocked awe.

 "A shame it's not me." Chris said in a joking manner, a smile on his face. The group turned around to come face to face with the three Cobra Kai boys and Trixie, who used to be their friends. Well, Trixie hadn’t really done anything, had she?

 "What? You got something to say?" Mitch asked. 

Chris nods. "Yeah, did you see my new Lite book? There's some hard hitting stuff in there, if you know what I mean." Mitch's face twitched some as he thought back to the fight where Chris hit him with that book. 

"There's not enough security to protect your scrawny ass." Hawk threatened Demetri and Trixie put her arm in front of Hawk.

"I don't need security." Demetri's voice was cold and his eyes dark.

“You guys are acting like fools. Suck it up and go to class before we get into more trouble.” Trixie said, her tone icy as she spotted a teacher staring at them from afar. “Let’s go, Hawk.” She said and Hawk followed as well as the other Cobra Kai students.

_____________________________________________________

“Hi, Miguel.” Trixie whispered softly as she traced her hand on his arm, “Your mom and your grandma let me come visit you.” She placed down a bouquet of flowers on the table beside the hospital bed. 

Trixie sat down as she held Miguel's hand, “I hope you like my hair, dyed it blue just like you wanted me to.” She said with a bittersweet smile. The silence was deafening, the only thing she could hear was the beep of the heart monitor and her own heart beat.

“I know I messed up and you messed up too… But we can just be idiots who mess up together…” Trixie’s voice cracked, “I’m sorry…” She said, apologizing like she always did after she visited.

Trixie stood up with a shaky sigh before walking away, she was supposed to get ready for karate now. She just needed a bit more motivation.

_____________________________________________________

Trixie knocked on the apartment door, it’d been a few days since she had visited Tory. The apartment door opened to reveal Tory, who smiled slightly. “Hey, Trixie.” She said.

“Hey, sorry I couldn’t make it yesterday.” Trixie said as she was let into the apartment complex, “How’s your mom?”

“As good as she’s going to get.” Tory smiled slightly before Trixie wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

“I could work some extra shifts with you, and earn some money for your mom.” Trixie offered in a kind voice and Tory shook her head.

“No, I couldn’t ask you to do that. Especially after what happened, I owe so much-”

“I don’t mind, really. I’ll work some extra shifts and give you the money.” Trixie reassured the girl, holding both of her hands with a smile. Tory breathed in a shaky sigh before smiling.

“Thank you… So much…” She whispered.

_____________________________________________________

Trixie stroked her cat as she lay on her bed, staring at the ceiling. Just a few weeks ago, she had been hanging out and lying down on Miguel’s bed. God, why couldn’t she just get him out of her head?!

‘I told you it was a bad idea to get involved with him.’

‘It’s not your fault. And you said that about the relationship, not about karate.’

‘It’s your fault that he’s basically dead. He fell off the balcony because you decided to get all emotional over him kissing Sam.’

Trixie sat up, her cat jumping from her lap and curling up next to her leg. She whipped out her phone, scrolling on Instagram before finding a post she had posted with Miguel. 

It was her and Miguel sitting down at Cascade with their fries that Tory had served them. She smiled bittersweetly as she looked at Miguel’s face. Trixie felt her heart clench at the sight as she searched through her voicemail to pick out one in particular she had been listening to.

‘Hey, it’s Miguel. Last night was crazy and hopefully you got away from the police. I really have to tell you something. I-... I hope you won’t be mad… A-anyways you haven’t been responding to my calls or texts so I’m just leaving you this voice mail. Uh, bye, I guess.’

Trixie breathed out shakily before tossing her phone somewhere between her blankets. Dory looked up with a ‘meow’ before curling into the blue haired girl's lap. “Hey, I haven’t been giving you that much attention, have I?” She smiled slightly, stroking the cat’s head lovingly. 

Dory meowed in response and Trixie chuckled before getting off the bed with her cat in her arms. “Alright, well, I’ve got to meet Tory at Cascade.” Trixie kissed the top of her cat's head before setting him down to the ground.

(this is still so short I hate it but oh well...)

[browngonzo888]

Psychonauts OC: Agent Knight

Full name: Lance Louie Knight

Psychic abilities: patented “moon beam”, a long range mind beam that can sweep a room in a second. Powerful with a short time fuse. Can levitate far distances, bouncing on a psi-ball that resembles the moon. Excellent long-lasting psychic shield, but it’s only on one side. He is also known to dabble in herbaphony. Other abilities will be presented via comic

Appearance: Agent Knight wears a 2 piece outfit with neat pleated shirts and white gloves. His belt and boots are leather, and his belt buckle resembles a knight’s shield. He doubles his agent badge as a tie pin. On his coat breast he wears a fresh white lily, something that Zanotto points out is normally seen at funerals. His hair is platinum and his skin a bone palette.

Personality: Agent Knight is confident and self-absorbed. He’s liked by some and called a narcissist by others but he only laughs it off. He has earned a high ranking with an impressive number of arrests, even if he sometimes loses the “bad guy” which causes him to theatrically sulk for a few days. His larger-than-life attitude lights up any dull office corner at any time.

Background: As only Lance Knight, he was brought up in a boarding school where he made decent grades and indulged in a small theatre class. From there he went to acting school. He was later discovered to have powers when he lost his temper upon learning that a different student got a lead role he was after.

[development] Knight’s odd design is based off Mac Tonight, a fictional character created by the McDonalds franchise. His outfit and hair leans more into an 80s yuppie style, not too different from the likes of James Crocket or Patrick Bateman.

[Other goals] Psychonauts 2000 is a kind of time capsule experience of the late 90s to the year 2000 (and a little bit beyond).

Agent Knight will appear in chapter 3 “Ottos Lament”

[melrosing]

add the copenhagen trilogy to the my brilliant friend subgenre 😔 the childhood section REALLY hit like the first two books of my brilliant friend (less of a focus on female friendship—though there is a bit of it—but really captures that mid-20th c european working class childhood haunted by poverty misogyny and political upheaval + fantasies about getting away and strong prose) if u have any other recs PLEASE lmk because i'm also in my brilliant friend withdrawal ahhhh

ooh thank you so much for the rec! my friend actually also recced it to me a couple months back so I think I should really check it out soon. currently im in the middle of an mbf rewatch cos think im already anticipating the withdrawal after S4 💀

I wish I had more recs that hit in exactly the same way…. I liked Swing Time by Zadie Smith which was I think quite directly inspired by MBF (as in I think Smith outright says it is?? not certain but I know she loves MBF either way). and that’s about two black British girls growing up together in London. the first couple of acts I remember being fantastic but then Smith gets distracted by a bizarre subplot involving a secondary character that imo derails the book. still a great final chapter. also rec NW and White Teeth by Smith. Book of Goose by Yiyun Li is like if you simplified MBF to its barest essentials, good enough read but all the way through I was like I knoooow that’s what inspired this. so plot wise those are the nearest things I know but some other books that are maybe not quite the same hit but kind of scratch a similar spot for me:

The Country Girls trilogy by Edna O’Brien - this actually has a lot of similarities with MBF, it’s a Bildungsroman about Irish girlhood etc, studied this as part of a modern Irish lit module at uni and have thought about it often since

Patrick Melrose quintet by Edward St Aubyn - another Bildungsroman about the title character growing up in an abusive household and fighting through the trauma of it in adulthood, this also has an amazing HBO adaptation that I would rewatch if it weren’t so fucking painful lol

anything by Natalia Ginzburg - know Ferrante likes Ginzburg and I am a recent convert. I think her understated and straightforward style is very effecting and her stories are also generally portraits of the postwar Italian middle class

I’m Supposed to Protect You From All This by Nadja Spiegelman. if you know Maus (the graphic novel), this is a memoir by the writer’s daughter about her mother’s side of the family. it’s my favourite memoir I think I’ve ever read and kind of transformed the way I saw my own mother and grandmother lol

Breasts & Eggs by Mieko Kawakami - also has a lot of interesting conversations about womanhood, gender and sexuality and there are scenes in that book I think about all the time

Pachinko by Min Jin Lee - everyone and their grandmother recommends this but imo it is that good. yet another Bildungsroman but about a Korean woman living in postwar Japan

anyway might be loads I can’t remember rn but any of the above I really rec! also I’m like one away from reading everything of Ferrante’s and I haven’t found a dud yet. second fave for now is The Days of Abandonment which I think some day would make a great art house horror film lol

[heavencasteel420]

For the unwritten/unpublished ask game thing, 4 and 5. Preferably that vibes-based Lucas story you've mentioned.

Thank you for asking!

4. Something I'm unsure about including: there might be a love triangle that would require some careful handling regarding race, class, and gender. The fic would be set during fall of freshman year. Lucas and Max aren't going out in any formal sense--she won't go on dates with him or do PDA at school or call herself his girlfriend--but sometimes she'll hang out with him in her trailer home and they'll make out. He wants more than this, but that's about all she can give and he takes it because he misses her terribly. Meanwhile, more girls at school are starting to notice him, because he's good-looking and he's on the basketball team. Patrick, looking out for his younger teammate, introduces him to freshman girl Danielle McCorkle. She's pretty, ladylike, and way into 4-H; the McCorkles are the established black farming family in Hawkins.

(Side note: in the social world of Hawkins, most of the well-to-do black families are farmers who have been around for one hundred years or more and live out in the country; the McKinneys are another example. There is a smaller group of newer arrivals like the Sinclairs--doctors, lawyers, accountants--who are scattered throughout the nice developments, plus some working-class black families who are mostly clustered in one okay-ish neighborhood near downtown.)

Lucas goes with Danielle to a dance, but he feels conflicted about it. He's still hung up on Max, who gives her blessing but kind of sulks about it, but Danielle's really sweet and cute and, you know what, it is cool that she knows so much about how to grow different kinds of peppers even if he never really thought about that kind of thing. At the same time, he starts to feel like he's being encouraged to date her by more than one of his teammates because they're way more comfortable with him dating a black girl from a nice family than a poor, "weird" white girl like Max. Which is one thing coming from Patrick, who's also just trying to get by as a black kid in a majority white school (and who, it turns out, feels protective of Danielle, a younger family friend, and doesn't want Lucas to treat her as second-best), but a lot more infuriating when it's the white guys on the team. They're not like Billy--they wouldn't tell him it's wrong to date a white girl, let alone try to kill him over it--but they're still more prejudiced than they think.

I don't think there's any big fallout--the relationship with Danielle just kind of trails off and Max continues to drift away--but both girls end up feeling slighted, partly for class/race reasons. Max is like "of course he wants Danielle, she's so pretty and perfect and her family isn't a disaster area" and Danielle is like "I try so hard to look the right way and act the right way, and he'd still rather moon over a white girl who doesn't even want him around." And, while neither girl is really being fair to Lucas or understands whether the other girl is coming from, their insecurities are based in real-world prejudices that they have suffered. And I really want to be fair to Danielle, who is getting an incredible amount of shit as a black girl in-universe and doesn't have built-in audience sympathy because she's an OC.

5. Is there any scene I'm excited about writing: not to sound like a sicko, but I am jazzed to give Lucas PTSD and make his (attentive! loving!) parents pretty flawed at handling it, partly because they're working with incomplete information and partly because they never really unpacked Charles's own bout with Vietnam-War-related PTSD shortly after Erica was born. Like they are both trying to help and dissuade him from being down on himself for having trauma, but they won't get him professional mental health care because then it becomes Too Real to them.

Also, he's going to find a hobby that's just for him, that he's pretty sure that no one in his life is going to understand and that he's starting pretty late if he ever wants it to be more than a hobby, but it's all his!!! He gets unexpected encouragement from two people (Max and a surprise person!).

[ausetkmt]

CHRONOLOGY OF AMERICAN RACE RIOTS AND RACIAL VIOLENCE p-5

1961 May First Freedom Ride. 1962 Harlem Youth Opportunities Unlimited (HARYOU) is founded. Robert F. Williams publishes Negroes with Guns, exploring Williams’ philosophy of black self-defense. October Two die in riots when President John F. Kennedy sends troops to Oxford,Mississippi, to allow James Meredith to become the first African American student to register for classes at the University of Mississippi. 1963 Publication of The Fire Next Time by James Baldwin. Revolutionary Action Movement (RAM) is founded. April Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr., writes his ‘‘Letter from Birmingham Jail.’’

June Civil rights leader Medgar Evers is assassinated in Mississippi. August March on Washington; Rev. King delivers his ‘‘I Have a Dream’’ speech before the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, D.C.

September Four African American girls—Carol Denise McNair, Cynthia Wesley, Carole Robertson, and Addie Mae Collins—are killed when a bomb explodes at theSixteenth Street Baptist Church in Birmingham, Alabama. 1964 June–August Three Freedom Summer activists—James Earl Chaney, Andrew Goodman, and Michael Schwerner—are arrested in Philadelphia, Mississippi; their bodies are discovered six weeks later; white resistance to Freedom Summer activities leads to six deaths, numerous injuries and arrests, and property damage acrossMississippi. July President Lyndon Johnson signs the Civil Rights Act. New York City (Harlem) riot. Rochester, New York, riot. Brooklyn, New York, riot. August Riots in Jersey City, Paterson, and Elizabeth, New Jersey. Chicago, Illinois, riot. Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, riot. 1965 February While participating in a civil rights march from Selma to Montgomery, Alabama, Jimmie Lee Jackson is shot by an Alabama state trooper. Malcolm X is assassinated while speaking in New York City. March Bloody Sunday march ends with civil rights marchers attacked and beaten by local lawmen at the Edmund Pettus Bridge outside Selma, Alabama. Lowndes County Freedom Organization (LCFO) is formed in Lowndes County,Alabama. First distribution of The Negro Family: The Case for National Action, better known as The Moynihan Report, which was written by Undersecretary of Labor Daniel Patrick Moynihan and Nathan Glazer. July Springfield, Massachusetts, riot. August Los Angeles (Watts), California, riot. 1965–1967 A series of northern urban riots occurring during these years, including disorders in the Watts section of Los Angeles, California (1965), Newark, New Jersey (1967), and Detroit, Michigan (1967), becomes known as the Long Hot Summer Riots. 1966 May Stokely Carmichael elected national director of the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee (SNCC). June James Meredith is wounded by a sniper while walking from Memphis, Tennessee, to Jackson, Mississippi; Meredith’s March Against Fear is taken up by Martin Luther King, Jr., Stokely Carmichael, and others. July Cleveland, Ohio, riot. Murder of civil rights demonstrator Clarence Triggs in Bogalusa, Louisiana. September Dayton, Ohio, riot. San Francisco (Hunters Point), California, riot. October Black Panther Party (BPP) founded by Huey P. Newton and Bobby Seale. 1967

Publication of Black Power: The Politics of Liberation by Stokely Carmichael and Charles V. Hamilton. May Civil rights worker Benjamin Brown is shot in the back during a student protest in Jackson, Mississippi. H. Rap Brown succeeds Stokely Carmichael as national director of the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee (SNCC). Texas Southern University riot (Houston, Texas). June Atlanta, Georgia, riot. Buffalo, New York, riot. Cincinnati, Ohio, riot. Boston, Massachusetts, riot. July Detroit, Michigan, riot. Newark, New Jersey, riot. 1968 Publication of Soul on Ice by Eldridge Cleaver. February During the so-called Orangeburg, South Carolina Massacre, three black college students are killed and twenty-seven others are injured in a confrontation with police on the adjoining campuses of South Carolina State College and Claflin College. March Kerner Commission Report is published. April Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., is assassinated in Memphis, Tennessee. President Lyndon Johnson signs the Civil Rights Act of 1968. Washington, D.C., riot. Cincinnati, Ohio, riot. August Antiwar protestors disrupt the Democratic National Convention in Chicago. 1969 May James Forman of the SNCC reads his Black Manifesto, which calls for monetary reparations for the crime of slavery, to the congregation of Riverside Church in New York; many in the congregation walk out in protest. July York, Pennsylvania, riot. 1970 May Two unarmed black students are shot and killed by police attempting to control civil rights demonstrators at Jackson State University in Mississippi. Augusta, Georgia, riot. July New Bedford, Massachusetts, riot. Asbury Park, New Jersey, riot. 1973 July So-called Dallas Disturbance results from community anger over the murder of a twelve-year-old Mexican-American boy by a Dallas police officer. 1975–1976 A series of antibusing riots rock Boston, Massachusetts, with the violence reaching a climax in April 1976. 1976 February Pensacola, Florida, riot. 1980 May Miami, Florida, riot. 1981 March Michael Donald, a black man, is beaten and murdered by Ku Klux Klan members in Mobile, Alabama. 1982 December Miami, Florida, riot. 1985 May Philadelphia police drop a bomb on MOVE headquarters, thereby starting a fire that consumed a city block. 1986 December Three black men are beaten and chased by a gang of white teenagers in Howard Beach, New York; one of the victims of the so-called Howard Beach Incident is killed while trying to flee from his attackers. 1987 February–April Tampa, Florida, riots. 1989 Release of Spike Lee’s film, Do the Right Thing. Representative John Conyers introduces the first reparations bill into Congress—the Commission to Study Reparation Proposals for African Americans Act; this and all subsequent reparations measures fail passage. August Murder of Yusef Hawkins, an African American student killed by Italian-American youths in Bensonhurst, New York. 1991 March Shooting in Los Angeles of an African American girl, fifteen-year-old Latasha Harlins, by a Korean woman who accused the girl of stealing. Los Angeles police officers are caught on videotape beating African American motorist Rodney King. 1992 April Los Angeles (Rodney King), California, riot. 1994 Survivors of the Rosewood, Florida, riot of 1923 receive reparations. February Standing trial for a third time, Byron de la Beckwith is convicted of murdering civil rights worker Medgar Evers in June 1963.

[frostcorpsclub]

Template: https://www.deviantart.com/pingguolover/art/Character-Inspiration-Meme-962807148

White Diamond

“White is described as being difficult and has a temper that can take a while to cool down: She appeared both calm and understanding during her first meeting with Steven, greeting him (as Pink Diamond) warmly despite his appearance bearing no resemblance to how Pink Diamond actually looked. However, White is curt and dismissive, interrupting Steven whenever he tries to speak to her, and then immediately sends him away to another room without warning as soon as she is done. She treats the entire affair with the Earth, the Rebellion, Pink's faked shattering and absence for the last 6,000 years with a mixture of patronization and nonchalance, remarking it all being simply one of "Pink's games" and asks Steven (as Pink) if he "had fun" and "got it out of [his] system."

Lucille Bluth

“Lucille is extremely critical and manipulative of those around her and usually acts in a completely self-serving way. Years of living a life of luxury have brought out her harsh elitism, perhaps best shown by how poorly she treats her housekeeper. Even those of her social status are not immune, such as her "best friend" who is constantly plotted against by Lucille Bluth. Even while raising the kids, Lucille never put anyone else before her. She's very comfortable letting her children know what disappointments they are.”

Mary Poppins

“She is extraordinary and strange, neat and tidy, delightfully vain yet particular, and sometimes a little frightening but always exciting. She is practically perfect in every way and always means what she says. Mary Poppins is sweet and nurturing, but she is no pushover. She guides Jane and Michael in the right directions with a gentle, but firm hand.”

Patrick Bateman

This one is a little more complicated, Patricks function in the novel is not to have a personality. 

To quote a user, “To assign Patrick Bateman a personality is to miss the point of the character’s role and function in the novel. Asking for a description of Bateman’s personality is similar to asking for a description of the personality of a well-dressed mannequin in a high-end men’s fashion store. What you see is what you get or, in the context of the novel, what you read is what you see.” 

However, the best example for the inspiration I took from him is this portion from his monologue in the beginning of the film:

“There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman. Some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me. Only an entity. Something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours, and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable, I simply am not there.”

Pristine Klimer

“She is rich, beautiful, and resourceful, yet arrogant. Like other Hill parents, she has little concern for her children. She looks down on the Valley people for their deformities and being lower-class like other Hill residents do. Pristine can be a bit over-dramatic, but is shown to have a forgiving side. She's constantly seen smiling, but at times her grinning comes off as forced.”

Francine Smith

“Francine is a stereotypical trophy housewife who generally seems to enjoy her position in life. She has previously criticized Stan for locking her up without any shirts to fold, as she "hates down time." A devoted housewife and unconditionally loving mother who tries to have her family bond with one another. Francine also had a tendency to be extremely obsessive sometimes to the point of threatening loved ones or even mutilating herself to reach her goals. When she was desperate to have another baby, she actually aimed a gun at her own husband though she deliberately missed when she fired it. Francine's brain has been repeatedly damaged or tampered with by her husband in acts of foolishness.”

Karen Smith 

“Dim-witted, easy-going, and flirty. Karen might not be the “most smartest,” but she could be psychic. (She even thinks she can predict the weather with her breasts.) Although she’s easily influenced by her friends, she still loves hanging out with them and doing fun things. With her enthusiastic approach to life, Karen has a magnetic presence and people enjoy being in her company.”

[rockislandadultreads]

Libby Spotlight: Hunger Games Series eBook Read-Alikes

Excited for The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes? Be sure to check out one of these eBook read-alikes available on Libby!

We Unleash the Merciless Storm by Tehlor Kay Mejia

Being a part of the resistance group La Voz is an act of devotion and desperation. On the other side of Medio’s border wall, the oppressed class fights for freedom and liberty, sacrificing what little they have to become defenders of the cause.

Carmen Santos is one of La Voz’s best soldiers. She spent years undercover, but now, with her identity exposed and the island on the brink of a civil war, Carmen returns to the only real home she’s ever known: La Voz’s headquarters.

There she must reckon with her beloved leader, who is under the influence of an aggressive new recruit, and with the devastating news that her true love might be the target of an assassination plot. Will Carmen break with her community and save the girl who stole her heart—or fully embrace the ruthless rebel she was always meant to be?

This is the second volume of the "We Set the Dark on Fire" series.

Skyhunter by Marie Lu

The Karensa Federation has conquered a dozen countries, leaving Mara as one of the last free nations in the world. Refugees flee to its borders to escape a fate worse than death—transformation into mutant war beasts known as Ghosts, creatures the Federation then sends to attack Mara.

The legendary Strikers, Mara's elite fighting force, are trained to stop them. But as the number of Ghosts grows and Karensa closes in, defeat seems inevitable.

Still, one Striker refuses to give up hope.

Robbed of her voice and home, Talin Kanami knows firsthand the brutality of the Federation. Their cruelty forced her and her mother to seek asylum in a country that considers their people repugnant. She finds comfort only with a handful of fellow Strikers who have pledged their lives to one another and who are determined to push Karensa back at all costs.

When a mysterious prisoner is brought from the front, Talin senses there’s more to him than meets the eye. Is he a spy from the Federation? Or could he be the weapon that will save them all?

This is the first volume of the "Skyhunter" series.

The Knife of Never Letting Go by Patrick Ness

Todd Hewitt is the only boy in a town of men. Ever since the settlers were infected with the Noise germ, Todd can hear everything the men think, and they hear everything he thinks. Todd is just a month away from becoming a man, but in the midst of the cacophony, he knows that the town is hiding something from him - something so awful Todd is forced to flee with only his dog, whose simple, loyal voice he hears too. With hostile men from the town in pursuit, the two stumble upon a strange and eerily silent creature: a girl. Who is she? Why wasn't she killed by the germ like all the females on New World? Propelled by Todd's gritty narration, readers are in for a white-knuckle journey in which a boy on the cusp of manhood must unlearn everything he knows in order to figure out who he truly is.

This is the first volume of the "Chaos Walking" series.

Gone by Michael Grant

In the blink of an eye, everyone disappears. Gone. Except for the young.

There are teens, but not one single adult. Just as suddenly, there are no phones, no internet, no television. No way to get help. And no way to figure out what's happened.

Hunger threatens. Bullies rule. A sinister creature lurks. Animals are mutating. And the teens themselves are changing, developing new talents—unimaginable, dangerous, deadly powers—that grow stronger by the day. It's a terrifying new world. Sides are being chosen, a fight is shaping up. Townies against rich kids. Bullies against the weak. Powerful against powerless. And time is running out: On your 15th birthday, you disappear just like everyone else...

This is the first volume of the "Gone" series.

[aristocratic-otter]

15 Questions | 15 People

Rules: Answer these 15 Questions, then Tag 15 People 

Thanks for tagging me @theearlgreymage! These are always fun :)

1. Are you named after anyone? So, I'm named after my father's former best friend, Patrick Michael. Funny story, he and my dad fell out shortly after I was born, and they've never seen each other again. Oh well, at least I got a decent name out of it.

2. When was the last time you cried? I'm crying right now, listening to the song @cutestkilla and @moodandmist made for me for the hundredth time. Otherwise, I mostly only cry during movies.

3. Do you have kids? Two kids, one grown, one in high school begging to read my fics (oops?)

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot? I have to echo @theearlgreymage. I teach secondary. Sarcasm is a survival skill.

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people? Their expressions. Don't try to ask me what they were wearing. Like, ever. I don't see bodies, only faces. I suck at dress code enforcement.

6. What’s your eye color? Hazel. But you can't see the green until I'm in bright sunlight. Then it's mostly green.

7. Scary movies or happy ending? Happy endings, most definitely. A sad movie may be important and worthwhile, but I like my crying to happen in the middle of the movie, not the end.

8. Any special talents? Writing? Patience, that's got to be a talent. Focus?

9. Where were you born? SoCal, baby!  

10. What are your hobbies? Just writing at the moment. I want to scrapbook, but never find the time. And reading fanfiction, duh.

11. Do you have any pets? The family has a white sharpie/lab mix named Hazel and my daughter has a guinea pig, Ashley, and a Piebald Boa baby who holds my whole heart. (Picture of Jamz acting like a cat under the cut.)

12. What sports do you play/have you played? Not sporty, in the least. I took dance classes and lap swimming in college for my PE credit, does that count? I guess I like hiking.

13. How tall are you? 5'7"

14. Favorite subject at school? English. And no, I don't teach English, lol.

15. Dream job? Is professional volunteer a job? Shit's so hard for teachers right now, man. I'd love to just give it all up to be able to volunteer as tutor, and for nature programs and for the food bank, and spend my downtime scrapbooking and writing. So, if we're dreaming...

I'll tag my fifteen here, since there's a snake below the cut and I know you might not all love the noodle babies like I do.

Tagging: @artsyunderstudy, @bookish-bogwitch, @carryonsimoncarryonbaz, @fight-surrender, @fatalfangirl, @facewithoutheart, @foolofabookwyrm-activated, @giishu, @ileadacharmedlife, @ivelovedhimthroughworse, @ionlydrinkhotwater, @frjsti, @krisrix, @cutestkilla, @moodandmist

Here's a Jamzie boy. I have NO idea why the picture pasted in sideways

[crawfxxrd]

JEREMY ALLEN WHITE, CIS MALE, HE/HIM – There goes KENNETH CRAWFORD clocking into the SUNSET DINER. The TWENTY-NINE year old is a LINE COOK from NEW ORLEANS, LA. I think they are TENACIOUS but I heard that they can also be SELF-DEPRECATING. Hope they have a good shift! 

tw: absent parent, illness/stroke, parent death, gambling, religion mention, jail

at the tail end of his freshman year, life flipped upside down when his mother suffered a severe stroke. things we never the same after that. his spot on the baseball team was dropped in favor of hospital visits. new clothes were put off in order to pay the bills. homework fell to the wayside; grades along with it. crawford could only give so much. his father should have given more; should have given anything, but it seemed as if he’d almost taken it as his way out. his first foot out the door.

crawford always had an iffy relationship with the church, but he’d held out up until that fateful night in december. his father had always been a gambler – horses, chips, lotto tickets. that last one finally showed up. 140 million, the papers said. crawford never did hear the exact truth from his not; dad had gathered his things and left before he’d gotten the chance. never looked back. seventeen and crawford was alone. he stopped believing in god after that.

he’d gone by k.p. – short for kenneth patrick– up until the midst of high school. then, as his father pulled back, he did too from that given name, the one that he and his father shared. it became crawford. just crawford.

from the outside, he was the boy that barely made it to graduation. everyone’s guess to fail. they weren’t wrong; his grades had suffered, falling as he begged for more and more hours behind the dish pit at the sunset diner. college was never an option. taking care of his mom became the number one priority.

in time, crawford graduated beyond dish, learning to prep for the kitchen and then finally cook.

just a little over a year ago, his mom suffered a second stroke and sadly passed. it’s been a complicated thing for him to process, sad because he misses her but also... he’d been missing her since he was fifteen. 

between past medical and funeral expenses and the cost of living, crawford’s car has fallen in terms of priority. good ol’ gretchen had a habit of breaking down from time to time; never enough to junk her but always enough to threaten it again and then some.

when he’s not at his apartment or the diner, crawford likes to spend his time getting tattooed at pink ink, tossing back drinks at the local dive, and sitting out in the bed of his truck, whether its braving settler’s woods or just hanging back in the motel parking lot.

crawford’s main mode of transportation is gretchen, but he’s also got red: a motorcycle he’d pre-emptively inherited from his mother.

crawford grew up living in a local trailer park. his family had a short stint in a more spacey apartment when he was in elementary school, but that was just a year and half. then his father got caught and charged with a class b theft and a year behind bars. he’s been back in that trailer ever since.

his family was known to have records. both of his grandfathers had had their stints, then his father. even his mother with a few acts of shoplifting, though she’s mostly wasn’t welcome in certain places anymore. didn’t make much a difference now. but crawford was pretty proud that he’d managed to keep his nose clean, though he’d definitely had some close calls with a bar fight or two.

WANTED CONNECTIONS:

best friend(s)

friends

old friends

drinking buddies

ex-girlfriends - (he be tragically heterosexual)

fwb

one-night stand

enemy/do not get along

regular customer

an annoying customer

old coworker

neighbors

there’s plenty more i just cannot think atm

[crawfxrds]

[ jeremy allen-white, cis-male, he/him ] - was that KENNETH CRAWFORD i saw by the lighthouse today? i heard that the TWENTY-EIGHT year old who has been in nightrest for HIS WHOLE LIFE and works as a KITCHEN MANAGER & COOK AT MAMA’S has a reputation of being STEADFAST, but also SELF-DEPRECATING. they reside in FOG GATE & people in town usually associate them with A CHEAP BOTTLE OF WELL WHISKEY, THE STING OF GRABBING A HOT PLATE AND NOT LETTING GO, A BLACK MILK CRATE THRONE TUCKED BESIDE THE DUMPSTER, & A LOTTERY TICKET SKITTERING OFF INTO THE NIGHT. let’s hope the killer doesn’t go after them next.

tw: absent parent, illness/stroke, parent death, gambling, religion mention, jail

at the tail end of his freshman year, life flipped upside down when his mother suffered a severe stroke. things we never the same after that. his spot on the baseball team was dropped in favor of hospital visits. new clothes were put off in order to pay the bills. homework fell to the wayside; grades along with it. crawford could only give so much. his father should have given more; should have given anything, but it seemed as if he’d almost taken it as his way out. his first foot out the door.

crawford always had an iffy relationship with the church, but he’d held out up until that fateful night in december. his father had always been a gambler – horses, chips, lotto tickets. that last one finally showed up. 140 million, the papers said. crawford never did hear the exact truth from his not; dad had gathered his things and left before he’d gotten the chance. never looked back. seventeen and crawford was alone. he stopped believing in god after that.

he’d gone by k.p. – short for kenneth patrick– up until the midst of high school. then, as his father pulled back, he did too from that given name, the one that he and his father shared. it became crawford. just crawford.

from the outside, he was the boy that barely made it to graduation. everyone’s guess to fail. they weren’t wrong; his grades had suffered, falling as he begged for more and more hours behind the dish pit at the sunset diner. he found himself oddly thankful then that he hadn't gotten accepted to wardwell on scholarship. it'd been his mother's idea to apply, a why not try sort of thing. on top of that, college was never an option anyway. taking care of his mom became the number one priority.

in time, crawford graduated beyond dish, learning to prep for the kitchen, upgraded to a cook, until he recently became kitchen manager. he's still learning what this new responsibility means and how to handle it.

just a little over a year ago, his mom suffered a second stroke and sadly passed. it’s been a complicated thing for him to process, sad because he misses her but also… he’d been missing her since he was fifteen.

between past medical and funeral expenses and the cost of living, crawford’s car has fallen in terms of priority. good ol’ gretchen had a habit of breaking down from time to time; never enough to junk her but always enough to threaten it again and then some.

when he’s not at his trailor in fog gate or the diner, crawford likes to spend his time getting tattooed at permanent record, tossing back drinks at deadlights, and sitting out in the bed of his truck, whether its putting up with the ambiance of shipwreck beach or just hanging back in mama's parking lot.

crawford’s main mode of transportation is gretchen, but he’s also got red: a motorcycle he’d pre-emptively inherited from his mother.

crawford grew up living the local trailer park in fog gate. his family had a short stint in a more spacey apartment when he was in elementary school, but that was just a year and half. then his father got caught and charged with a class b theft and a year behind bars. he’s been back in that trailer ever since.

his family was known to have records. both of his grandfathers had had their stints, then his father. even his mother with a few acts of shoplifting, though she’s mostly wasn’t welcome in certain places anymore. didn’t make much a difference now. but crawford was pretty proud that he’d managed to keep his nose clean, though he’d definitely had some close calls with a bar fight or two.

wanted connections:

best friend(s)

friends

old friends

drinking buddies

motorcycle buddies

ex-girlfriends - (he be tragically heterosexual)

fwb

one-night stand

enemy/do not get along

regular customer

an annoying customer

old coworker

neighbors

there’s plenty more i just cannot think atm